First WTF occurred at 4:57 a.m. I got up and couldn’t fall back to sleep for the following reasons:
1. I began the involuntary process of trying to solve all of my problems/the world’s problems. (The problems are still there despite epic brainstorming.)
2. I woke my dog (and her bladder) up.
3. I contemplated starting work early to get a head start and remembered things I was supposed to do yesterday.
4. I opened up my laptop to create the invoice that is now overdue. It was dead.
5. I started to look for my charger and it was nowhere to be found. I mean, it was completely MIA. I looked in places that haven’t been unearthed in awhile, and it’s still missing. (What’s the over/under it is in my son’s room?)
6. Antsy dog with a full bladder insisted on going out.
7. I couldn’t walk the streets in my pajamas in the wee hours of the morning (I am new to the neighborhood), so I got dressed.
8. Getting dressed=mandatory coffee brewing.
9. Properly caffeinated, I packed my son’s lunch.
10. Lunch packing incited serious snack envy.
11. Why do I feel like I am gaining weight looking at his snacks?
12. Why am I not the type of person who goes to the gym at 5:00 a.m.?
13. How many calories are in Nutella anyway?